Sunday, January 31, 2010

Did I mention fear...again?

I am hoping, hoping, hoping and praying, praying, praying that my man gets offered "the job" tomorrow. It has been such a long interview process, and he is so in need and deserving of a positive change. Of course it would be an enormous shift and change for all of us. Emotions are running the gamut of fear, anticipated disappointment, joy, fear, trepidation, elation, fear, anger, gratitude, excitement and did i mention fear. I long to be the trusting, peaceful "i know the decision will be exactly what it needs to be for us" person but quite honestly I am more often in the "if he doesn't get this offer life is just not fair what are we going to do now?" mode.
Such is my ongoing struggle to let go and trust in the universe...

Everything will be ok in the end, if its not ok, its not the end.


michelle said...

Oh I will keep my fingers crossed for him to get the offer. Isn't it thrilling and terrifying all at the same time. To want the change, to know it would be great, grand even; and then to also be afraid of finding out because what if it is not the answer he wants, or what if it is and then the change is real.

This is going to sound so crazy but your post was marked as posted at 12:12 and 1212 has been my lucky number my whole life so I feel good about this offer he is waiting to hear about!

Thanks for coming by my blog and for leaving a comment!

RNW said...

I can totally relate to the desire to be a "trusting, peaceful 'i know the decision will be exactly what it needs to be for us'" kind of person but that is soooooo not me. I tie myself up in knots with worry and anxiety with the idea that this will somehow help control the outcome. It doesn't, it just makes me fidgety and difficult to be around. My husband, on the other hand, is completely the opposite and he trusts that we will be able to handle whatever happens, as long as we are doing it together.

Usually, I think, everything IS okay in the end, even if it doesn't look like what we thought it was supposed to look like. (Hindsight and all that, right?)

I am wishing for the best outcome for you and your family.